Viewing 10 posts - 1 through 10 (of 10 total)
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  • #5916
    Lenny E
    Member
    A Catholic Priest, a Baptist Preacher and a Rabbi all served as Chaplains to the students of a northern university. They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk shop.

     

    One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn’t

    really all that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear.

    One thing led to another, and they decided to do an experiment. They

    would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to

    convert it to their religion.

     

    Seven days later, they all came together to discuss their experiences.

    Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, was on crutches, and had

    various bandages on his body and limbs, went first.

    ‘Well,’ he said, ‘I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I

    found him, I began to read to him from the Catechism.

     

    Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me

    around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary

    Mother of God, he became as gentle as a lamb. The Bishop is coming out

    next week to give him first communion and confirmation.’

     

    Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, had one arm and

    both legs in casts, and had an IV drip.

     

    In his best fire-and-brimstone oratory, he exclaimed, ‘WELL, brothers, you

    KNOW that we Baptists don’t sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear.

    And then I began to read to my bear from God’s HOLY WORD! But that

    bear wanted nothing to do with me.

     

    So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quickly DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus..Hallelujah!

     

    The Priest and the Reverend both looked down at the Rabbi, who was lying in

    a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IVs and monitors

    running in and out of him. He was in really bad shape. The Rabbi looked up and said: “Looking back on it, ….circumcision may not

    have been the best way to start.”
    #74683
    David Gerard
    Member

    HA!!!!!!! I love that joke!

    #75609
    David Gerard
    Member

    We did a bit of bear converting ourselves.  Converted bear to food.

    Brother Dan and I took some friends and a film crew bear hunting on weds.
    Maybe you recognizes them?    What a day we had! stellar weather, great guys all around and cooperative bears.
    Dan and I were excited to see just how a Discovery show episode was in fact put together.  Most all of what will air was truthful footage.  These guys are excellent hunters.  We had lots of great bear stories while hanging out in the blind.
    The father son portrait i took at 12:30 am, we were wiped out!
    #75611
    Lenny E
    Member

    Thanks for that David. That is cool! David, da movie star! You go guy!

    I only ate bear once. A blackie. It was an older one grandpa shot, a little tough and gamey but delicious nonetheless.

    Oh BTW, when I was back to the US in March, the ladies really loved the assorted game package you sent. Thanks, that made their day!

    They saved me some salmon (ate the rest, they did!). It was delicious.

    #75619
    David Gerard
    Member

    Lenny, we made some italian sweet sausage the very next day, ooooh boy! I shared some with the camera crew, they were delighted. I told them all who go on the hunt share in the bounty, its tradition and a standard. I cant wait to see the show air
    this winter. They said the footage was some of the best they got during the 3 years of this show,”Alaska, the last frontier”

    You can watch the show on the Discovery web site. The episode “poopsicle” looks fun, the deer hunt was filmed with my friend’s boat. a WW2 army T boat converted for hunting trips and charters.

    #75627
    Lenny E
    Member

    Thanx David, I will look for those.

    #76612
    David Gerard
    Member

    So the episode aired with the bear hunt Sun night. Came out good I thought, all events pretty much the way they happened. Funny to see my skiff in the show. My daughter was surprised she saw her row boat in there too. The show showed Otto blowing into a tractor gas tank and the pressure blew gas back on him all over his face…GEEEZ OTTO! What the hell were you thinking LOL.
    The bear taste pretty good too!

    #76629
    Lenny E
    Member

    Oh Way Cool David.

    Thanx for the update!

    Ye be a movie star now. Expect some scripts and casting calls.

    #76685
    David Gerard
    Member

    Lenny,  we werent in the show………. but my skiffs were.  Mady saw the show and said “hey! Dad!  you took my row boat and didnt even ask me!”

    Guilty.
    There is an episode coming up where they get a huge bull moose.
    They went with a guide  we know.  He basically just takes them to an area he knows.  The cool thing is the whole gang can leave the Kilcher homestead directly on their horses…for real.
    I heard folks from all around have been sending them food thinking they are in need of it.   It’s a show folks!  
    They do live on a homestead, they do grow and catch  much of their own food but…they raise cattle.  They are not starving.
    #76687
    Lenny E
    Member

    Well David,

    I think you should be in the show! Give me the directors number! I want to see you and your 7 mm out there stalking some game!

    Hey us fabnetters stick together…thicker than thieves or family or blood relations we be!

    Hey maybe later I can get on with my Tesla inspired “death ray”. See guys , the Moose is dead, all the hair fried off and Cooked too!

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